Check it out... I'm TOTALLY hot!
Jan. 4th, 2008 12:24 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
in_the_blueAre you ready, kids?
I think it's time. It's a new year, and that means it's time for a NEW WRITING CHALLENGE. So roll up your sleeves, crack your knuckles, and let's begin!
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to let one of your roleplay characters write THE WORST FANFICTION EVER. It can be fanfiction about their canon or about another canon, but it has to be written by one of your roleplay characters and has to be submitted by that RP journal. Got it? So, for instance, Jet Black could submit the Ed/Ein fantasy he's always wanted to write, or Hermione Granger could pen that little ditty about Neville and Mimbulus Mimbletonia in the Astronomy Tower, or... Jack Sparrow could weave a tale of intrigue about Axel and Demyx. Whatever, so long as it's submitted by a roleplay character and it's bad fanfiction: you get the picture.
Rules:
Fandom: any fandom your RP character wants to write, either his/her own or a different one.
Word count: 1000 or less
Main theme: BAD FANFICTION.
Ratings: No restrictions, but for the love of God, don't violate the LJ TOS.
Duration: Challenge opens now (January 4) and closes at 11:59 p.m. in whatever time zone you inhabit on Friday, January 26. We give you lots and lots of time for this one.
Come one, come all, and pimp this one far and wide. Let's get a lot of crack fanfiction for this challenge. I'd love to see the worst your characters can do... and honestly, so would they.
Rule clarification: if you don't have a roleplay journal for the character begging to write the WORST FANFIC EVER, submit it anonymously and let everyone know which character's writing it. You'll have to remember to check back for comments, but that ought to work. Or heck, write it with your own journal and just make it very clear which character authored your epic piece of nonsense.
I think it's time. It's a new year, and that means it's time for a NEW WRITING CHALLENGE. So roll up your sleeves, crack your knuckles, and let's begin!
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to let one of your roleplay characters write THE WORST FANFICTION EVER. It can be fanfiction about their canon or about another canon, but it has to be written by one of your roleplay characters and has to be submitted by that RP journal. Got it? So, for instance, Jet Black could submit the Ed/Ein fantasy he's always wanted to write, or Hermione Granger could pen that little ditty about Neville and Mimbulus Mimbletonia in the Astronomy Tower, or... Jack Sparrow could weave a tale of intrigue about Axel and Demyx. Whatever, so long as it's submitted by a roleplay character and it's bad fanfiction: you get the picture.
Rules:
Fandom: any fandom your RP character wants to write, either his/her own or a different one.
Word count: 1000 or less
Main theme: BAD FANFICTION.
Ratings: No restrictions, but for the love of God, don't violate the LJ TOS.
Duration: Challenge opens now (January 4) and closes at 11:59 p.m. in whatever time zone you inhabit on Friday, January 26. We give you lots and lots of time for this one.
Come one, come all, and pimp this one far and wide. Let's get a lot of crack fanfiction for this challenge. I'd love to see the worst your characters can do... and honestly, so would they.
Rule clarification: if you don't have a roleplay journal for the character begging to write the WORST FANFIC EVER, submit it anonymously and let everyone know which character's writing it. You'll have to remember to check back for comments, but that ought to work. Or heck, write it with your own journal and just make it very clear which character authored your epic piece of nonsense.
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Jinx Johnson Meets the Dark Lord Pt. 2 (repost)
Date: 2008-01-10 07:09 am (UTC)"I turned you into a chipmunk," Jinx told him as the Hogwarts defenders began to laugh. "With wandless magic, which was why you didn't notice anything," he added.
"I know how to do wandless magic, too!" chipmunk Voldemort declared. He puffed up his tiny, furry chest, preparing to cast the spell that would restore him to his previous fearsome form, but Jinx was quicker on the draw.
"Periodus, double infinitius, no erasius!" Jinx said quickly, and caught up the chipmunk in one strong hand. "Now you're a chipmunk forever!"
"NOOOO!" Voldemort cried in a squeaky chipmunk voice.
All of a sudden, Harry's eyes opened and he sat up. "Hey, I was supposed to defeat Voldemort!" he said, getting to his feet with the help of Ron Weasley and Hermione Granger.
"You snooze, you lose," Jinx told him. Unlike everyone else in the Great Hall, he wasn't at all surprised that Harry Potter wasn't really dead. "And his new name is Voldie-munk."
Jinx turned to his best friend, Paul Bumbleboris, who had just come in from helping Hagrid fight/cure the magical beings and creatures in the battle, depending on whether the creature was good or bad. Paul was covered in blood (not his own) and frankly didn’t smell very good, but judging from the admiring noises they made, the girls didn’t mind his getup at all. "Here, Paul, you finish him off."
But Paul was an animal lover and couldn't bring himself to turn into his Animagus form (a gigantic bear with dragon wings, razor-sharp teeth and poison breath) and rip a chipmunk to shreds, even if the chipmunk was Voldie-munk, who used to be the most evil wizard in the world, and not an ordinary furry little animal. "I have a better idea," he said.
Also using wandless magic (because he was cool and knew how), Paul conjured up a cage for Voldie-munk and, when Voldie-munk was inside, gave the cage to Harry. "Here," he said. "You decide what to do with him."
"Crikey, blimey and all that lot, wot!" Ron exclaimed as he peered into the cage where Voldie-munk was still shrieking and jumping and having a little chipmunk tantrum. "Don't kill him, Harry! I've always wanted a talking pet!"
"You know, you can make a lot of money if you teach it to sing," Hermione butted in, and she started in on this long lecture about a Muggle who got rich off some singing chipmunks.
Jinx knew all about that guy already, so he didn't bother to listen to Hermione's lecture. He turned away from her just as Mavis grabbed his arm.
"Oh, Jinx, you're my hero!" she said breathily, looking up at him with an adoring gaze and batting eyelashes. Her clothes had gotten torn during the battle, but her hair still looked good and she was still gorgeous overall.
"Doesn't the hero get a kiss?" Jinx asked her with a rakish grin.
"The hero gets anything he wants, studmuffin!" Mavis replied, and
(Oops, one thousand words. Plz r/r..,.tNx!!!11)
Re: Jinx Johnson Meets the Dark Lord Pt. 2 (repost)
Date: 2008-01-10 07:16 am (UTC)Re: Jinx Johnson Meets the Dark Lord Pt. 2 (repost)
Date: 2008-01-10 07:24 am (UTC)(And not named "Mavis.")
Re: Jinx Johnson Meets the Dark Lord Pt. 2 (repost)
Date: 2008-01-10 07:36 am (UTC)This is priceless and beautiful, but I have to say that:
a) I'm not in it;
b) I can see through the thinly-veiled disguises and
c) Ron's characterisation is not quite the parody it could be. I do believe he would have said Crikey, blimey, and all that rot, wot! That, however, is a minor point.
I'm particularly fond of Voldemort as a chipmunk. And you get bonus points for the film tie-in. (I wouldn't be surprised if you got promotional monies for it as well.)
Now. Please, kick back and have a margarita. You've earned it.
~Sirius
Re: Jinx Johnson Meets the Dark Lord Pt. 2 (repost)
Date: 2008-01-10 08:01 am (UTC)It's great to hear from you, and I'm glad you liked my story even if you weren't in it (besides other stuff).
It did cross my mind after I had posted this that you should have been in the story :( it would have been fun if you were there - and easier to reach 1000 words, too!
Re: Jinx Johnson Meets the Dark Lord Pt. 2 (repost)
Date: 2008-01-10 09:49 pm (UTC)But... are you saying that were I in your story, I would simply have talked out the entire thousand words? I'm certain I can do that; you've no idea what sort of thing you've unleashed here. For years and years in Azkaban I was silent; there was no point to talking because whenever one did, it had a tendency to draw the Dementors closer and closer. They waited for a lapse, a slip, a laugh, a happy sigh, and then... well, I shouldn't be talking about this. It's far too depressing for most people. Take Tonks, for instance: she would never let me even utter the word Azkaban in her presence. I think that was because in her days as Auror she sent far too many people there, and hearing my first-hand stories of how... lovely the place was might have sent her into something of a tailspin.
But listen to me! You know, I think I probably have a thousand words here already. I don't, but it feels like it. Yes, you and the troops should definitely visit us. We're on the west side of the island, where the sunsets are always beautiful and the mountains break up the wind so nicely. And the snorkeling... well, I should tell you that I've been working on a few charms that make the physical mask-and-snorkel combination unnecessary, as I have some small problem with anything that feels like restraints even after all this time, and it's made swimming so much more pleasant.
Also, there are no chipmunks.
Re: Jinx Johnson Meets the Dark Lord Pt. 2 (repost)
Date: 2008-01-10 08:55 pm (UTC)Re: Jinx Johnson Meets the Dark Lord Pt. 2 (repost)
Date: 2008-01-11 05:02 am (UTC)*dies*
aslkdfjasldfjasld;fjaldfjalsfjdalsdfjal;fj
You freaking rock!!!!
I don't have the words cuz I'ma laughing waaaaaaaaaaaaaay too hard.
Re: Jinx Johnson Meets the Dark Lord Pt. 2 (repost)
Date: 2008-01-12 05:52 pm (UTC)